Oleh: Ridwan Jasmawi*
Hening diam membisu, air mata bagai hujan terus mengalir di pipiku. Setelah aku mengetahui ternyata ibuku yang meneleponku malam itu, memberikan kabar kepadaku, bahwa ayahku sedang sakit, kenyataannya beliau telah tiada. Ia seolah-olah memberikan kesan kepadaku, bahwa ayahku sakit. Tanpa memberi tahu diriku bahwa ayah telah meninggal. Ibuku tidak ingin terjadi apa-apa denganku, karena ia tahu jarak perjalananku sangat jauh.
Aku mulai menenangkan diriku, berfikir jernih, menyemangati tubuh ku. aku harus kuat, aku harus tabah, dan aku harus ikhlas. Aku meyakini ayat Allah dalam Al-Qur’an Bahwa SETIAP YANG BERNYAWA PASTI AKAN MERASAKAN KEMATIAN.
Semua yang hidup di muka bumi ini lahir karena Allah, dan pasti juga kembali pada Allah. Mungkin aku dan keluarga sangat mencintai dan menyayangi ayahku, tapi kami percaya bahwa Allah lebih menyayangi beliau.
Setelah dimandikan dan hendak dikafani, dan bersiap-siap untuk disalatkan dan segera mungkin dikebumikan. Aku mendekati beliau aku mencium pipi kanan dan kirinya dan aku membisikkan ke telinganya: “Allahummagfirli waliwalidayya warhamhuma kama rabbayani shagira.” Ayah, aku menitipkan doa ini, semoga aku dan anak-anakmu yang lainnya senantiasa mendoakan engkau di akhir salatnya” kataku yang berusaha tegar.
Setelah aku, ibuku, kakakku, dan adek-adekku. Mencium dan memeluk ayahku yang terakhir kalinya. beliau kemudian diangkat dan sesuatu yang tidak pernah aku duga sebelumnya, anak yang paling dekat dengan ayahku, yaitu adekku yang ketiga. setiap harinya ia selalu merawatnya, membuatkan kopi sebelum kerja, membantunya di sela-sela pekerjaannya, ia kemudian berteriak sampai membuat suasana kembali pecah.
“Ayahku….. Mau dibawa kemana kasian itu ayahku? Tidak ada maka kasian yang perintah-perintah untuk buatkan air panas, tidak ada betul mi Ayahku,” katanya dengan suara terseduh-seduh.
Aku tak dapat menahan dan mendengarkan perkataan itu, seolah-olah aku tidak yakin kenapa secepat itu ayahku dijemput Oleh malaikat, ya Rabb? Teman-teman yang baca di paragraf ini, jujur aku menulis dengan batin yang berkecamuk aku tidak kuat rasanya mengingat kejadian itu.
Aku mendekatinya dan memeluknya dan berusaha untuk kutenangkan hati dan perasaannya. Aku berusaha menasehati untuk selalu tabah, sabar, dan ikhlas. Aku sangat memaklumi kejadian itu, aku tidak bisa melarang kakak dan adik-adikku untuk melampiaskan kekecewaannya. Sampai aku berkata kepada adikku. “Sabarki nah dek, semua ini sudah kehendak Allah, disayangi ayah, tapi ayah lebih nasayang Allah,” kataku memberikan nasihat kepadanya.
“Iyee, kak.”
“Sekarang yang terpenting doakan ayah semoga surga tempatnya, doakan ayah di setiap salat ta, ajari adik-adik salat dan berdoa sama-sama untuk ayah,” kataku.
Baru juga aku memberikan nasihat kepadanya, seolah aku tegar menghadapi ujian ini, meski kenyataannya hancur. Aku terdiam dengan perkataannya yang membisikkan ke telinga ku dengan suara yang terseduh-seduh…
“Kak mohon jangan Ki tinggalkan mama, saya, dan yang lain. Tidak ada mi kasian Laki-laki di sini ayah meninggal mi.”
“Yaa Rabb cobaan mu begitu berat engkau timpakan kepada kami, mohon berikan kami kesabaran dan ketabahan Ya Rabb,” Gumamku.
“Iyaa dek Kakak janji tinggal ka dulu disini sampai selesai acaranya Ayah” kataku sambil senyum meski hati perih.
Warga yang sudah siap mengantar ayah ku ke tempat peristirahatan terakhirnya, aku mengikuti dari belakang berjalan menuju pemakaman. tak henti-hentinya lisan ini mengucap doa dan dzikir yang tidak lain ditujukan kepada Almarhum ayah ku. Sesampainya di pemakaman, sepupu dari ayah ku, yang dari tadi stand by di kuburan untuk menggali kubur. Ia bahkan merasakan kesedihan yang kami alami. Bagaimana tidak? Ia menggali kubur, air matanya menyusul ke tanah layaknya hujan yang rintik-rintik.
Aku tidak tahu kesan apa? dan kenangan apa yang diberikan kepada warga di sini? Kenapa mereka sangat merasakan kehilangan? Tak satupun orang di sekelilingku tidak mengeluarkan air mata semua mengeluarkan air mata. Bahkan setingkat Asisten Bupati yang hadir pada waktu itu, tak mampu membendung air matanya.
Ketika orang mulai meninggalkan pemakaman, hanya aku seorang diri yang berdiri tegak di samping makam ayahku. Aku memilih untuk tinggal sejenak, sambil aku menaburkan bunga ke makamnya.
“Ayah… teriring salam dan doa, semoga engkau tenang di alam sana, aku berjanji aku yang menggantikanmu sebagai sosok ayah dalam keluarga”. []
*Penulis adalah Pengurus Bidang Humas DPP RPI
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